Archive for Little pieces of light

Happy St. Lucy Day!

Good things are worth waiting for- that is the message today as we celebrated the Feast of St. Lucy at our house.  It is the morning when all the candles are lit, and after getting Sarah out of bed with song, she lit our Christmas tree for the first time this season.  Breakfast of bacon ( of course!) eggs and pumpkin scones were shared by the lights of the tree, and the candles all around us. George Winston”s December CD  played in the background, music that always brings me back to this time of year.  All of our eyes contained bittersweet tears, knowing that next year, Sarah would be waking up in a dorm room on a college campus, and Tony and I would celebrate the morning without the joy of our three daughters, yet in the love of each other.

We started celebrating St. Lucy Day almost 18 years ago. It is a special day used to mark importance, to stop us in our tracks and  remind us to look for the sacred in the midst of our every day lives. Our holiday season seems to be taken over by constant commercialization. It is good to be quiet, to pause and soak in the light and love around us.

I struggled to wait for St. Lucy’s Day. I hosted two gatherings this month, including my gluten free cookie exchange last night when I was  tempted to light the tree. But Sarah kept telling me this was her last St. Lucy Day at home, and she didn’t want to be cheated out of the moment.

And what a wonderful, yet fleeting moment is was- before I knew it, the sun was rising, Sarah was finishing a paper for school, I packed her lunch and she was out the door.

As I sit and write this, the candles are still glowing and I can feel the warmth of of their light surrounding me. I know that what we have is amazing and special. Even if it was only a few moments together for breakfast before our beautiful Christmas tree, I know the moment will carry me through the day and remind me to bring light wherever I go!

On this feast day of light,  shine your light in the darkest corners of life and see what magic can happen in the moment!

Tell Your Story

Yesterday we celebrated family birthdays at my sister-in-laws house. As she handed my daughter her birthday gift, she handed me a gift too and said she couldn’t wait until Christmas.  Congratulations were in order now.

It was a beautiful hanging angel that says,”Tell Your Story.”  I nearly cried because I was so touched that she thought of me.   A small part of my healing journey will appear in  Speaking Your Truth: Courageous Stories from Inspiring Women, a book that is  being launched from Amazon on August 25th.  Sharing that small story has been a stepping stone for me to write my whole story.

I have been wanting to write about my healing experience for some time now.  It is true that when you set your intent on something, the universe begins to send all the resources and support you need to follow through with your intent.  I sometimes feel like writing a book is overwhelming, but when I get down on myself for not progressing as I think I should, an angel appears that says, “Tell your story.”  Or I get an email that says, we believe in you and want to be your accountability partners.  If there was ever a time to share the story of overcoming a year of illness, that time is now.

I recently rediscovered my heart virtue which is, ” I am committed to being a healing presence in the world.”   Writing my story is part of that journey.  I believe my story highlights that there is light in darkness and that no matter what you are going through, there is always some good, maybe in the people that help you, in any situation.  I want to share light and love to anyone who has struggled with challenges.  Hopefully my journey will be a beacon of hope.

I was so touched by my sister -in- law’s gift.  It reminded me that I am connected to the wider world, and that what I do is important.  What I write can make a difference.

I am grateful for this blog that allows me to share my story as it unfolds.  And grateful to the readers who let me know they are out there, supporting me along the way.  Let me know if there is any part of your story that you would like to tell. Maybe it will show up on the pages of my blog!

A Healing Presence

I am committed to being a healing presence in the world.

This statement came to me as I was finishing my third healing touch session for the day.  I was playing over in my head my heart virtue, or at least what I thought was my heart virtue- something about inspiring others to awaken to their own divine power.  I had taken an all day workshop in February to identify my heart virtue, a guiding light on my path of life.

I am committed to being a healing presence in the world. This statement rolled off my tongue and out into the world in glorious wonder.  It is concise and to the point, and contains very powerful words.

BEING- Notice I didn’t say I was committed to DOING.  All of my life I have been a doer, thinking that I need to accomplish something to be worth something.  God is telling me that just by BEING, I can make a difference in the world.

PRESENCE:  I am choosing to write about this word next because it defines my heart virtue more than any word.  What I love to do and feel I do quite well, is BE WITH.  I can be with someone in a one on one session, or I can be with someone when I am writing and am able to touch their inner being with my words.   When I am present to something or someone, my whole body and mind are attentive to the action/task at hand.  Maybe that means being tuned in to guidance for what healing touch technique would work best on this person now.  Or it means listening with compassion and allowing someone to share their story.  Presence is when I am in the flow and the words to a meditation just pour out of my mouth, or a section of my book is on the page in no time at all.   Presence means I am here right now and it is the only place to find love and peace.

HEALING:  This one is easy.  I just let God’s love shine through me and trust that who I am in the world is enough.  I have had those experiences where people I don’t know very well will open up to me and share their challenges.  I believe that is because God’s love flowing through me creates a safe space for people to be real.  I also believe that my own healing journey gives me some credentials that others can relate to.  It is as if the words “I knocked on death’s door and lived to tell about it” are stamped across my forehead.  I have been in a place many of these people are now experiencing, and they just want someone to hear them.  I love the quote “There is no one I can’t learn to love once I know their story.”  It is about acceptance that all of us are human and we are doing our best to find our way. If I can be a healing light to help someone’s journey, than I am living the life God intended for me.

The three words, Being, Healing and Presence fit so nicely together and create a very powerful statement about who I am and how I choose to live my life.

I am committed to being a healing presence in the world. I am grateful that I have the intuitive awareness to recognize this as my heart virtue and I look forward to moving out into the world, sharing more of who I am with the world.

Little Pieces of Light

Originally Posted in March to another blog.

Today in my Philosophers Notes, I was asked to answer the question, “What lights me up?  What is my passion?”  It was easy for me to answer writing because I have been doing it all my life.  It is my way of expressing myself and understanding the world around me.  I also have to say that what lights me up is being able to sit with a friend, hear her pain, and respond with love.   This morning I was with a friend who is suffering from adrenal exhaustion.  We talked about how hard it is to take care of ourselves when we have a family.  It is easy for us to always put their needs above our own, leading to more exhaustion.

I know how difficult it is to travel a journey toward wholeness after an illness.  I spent 150 days in the hospital fifteen years ago due to a Strep A infection. I was forced to take care of myself in order to get out of the hospital.  My journey did become more complicated when I returned home because now my husband was taking care of three little girls and his wife!  There were many days I felt guilty taking time for myself to nap or rest.  It is much more difficult to take care of yourself when there are others whose needs may feel more pressing.

As I shared  part of my own healing journey with my friend, I realized how powerful it was to say, “I have been there, and although it isn’t easy, you will get through this.”   It was as if  little pieces of light feel across her face shining some hope into her worn out spirit.    Sitting with her today reminded me of the story below.

The Story of the Ashes

“Jacob, where do you find the strength to carry on in life?

“Life is often heavy only because we attempt to carry it,” said Jacob.  “But I do find strength in the ashes.”

“In the ashes?” asked Mr. Gold.

“Yes,” said Jacob with a confirmation that seemed to travel a great distance.

“You see, Mr. Gold, each of us is alone.  Each of us is in the great darkness of our ignorance.  And each of us is on a journey.  In the process of our journey, we must bend to build a fire for light and warmth and food.  But when our fingers tear at the ground, hoping to find the coals of another’s fire, what we often find are the ashes.  And in these ashes, which will not give us light or warmth, there may be sadness, but there is also testimony.  Because the ashes tell us that somebody else has been in the night, somebody else has bent to build a fire, and somebody else has carried on.  And sometimes, that can be enough.”

Noah ben Shea


I have my own story to tell.  I think that my healing journey may help others find their way through difficult situations.  Maybe my words will be the coals someone bends to find in the midst of their pain.   It is time to write so that others can hold the pages in their hands, and be warmed by the hope that they too can carry on.   I look forward to bringing you excerpts from my book as I begin to tell my story of finding God in the midst of pain, and healing even though a chronic condition remains.

Little Pieces of Light

Today in my Philosophers Notes, I was asked to answer the question, “What lights me up?  What is my passion?”  It was easy for me to answer writing because I have been doing it all my life.  It is my way of expressing myself and understanding the world around me.  I also have to say that what lights me up is being able to sit with a friend, hear her pain, and respond with love.   This morning I was with a friend who is suffering from adrenal exhaustion.  We talked about how hard it is to take care of ourselves when we have a family.  It is easy for us to always put their needs above our own, leading to more exhaustion.

I know how difficult it is to travel a journey toward wholeness after an illness.  I spent 150 days in the hospital fifteen years ago due to a Strep A infection. I was forced to take care of myself in order to get out of the hospital.  My journey did become more complicated when I returned home because now my husband was taking care of three little girls and his wife!  There were many days I felt guilty taking time for myself to nap or rest.  It is much more difficult to take care of yourself when there are others whose needs may feel more pressing.

As I shared  part of my own healing journey with my friend, I realized how powerful it was to say, “I have been there, and although it isn’t easy, you will get through this.”   It was as if  little pieces of light feel across her face shining some hope into her worn out spirit.    Sitting with her today reminded me of the story below.

The Story of the Ashes

“Jacob, where do you find the strength to carry on in life?

“Life is often heavy only because we attempt to carry it,” said Jacob.  “But I do find strength in the ashes.”

“In the ashes?” asked Mr. Gold.

“Yes,” said Jacob with a confirmation that seemed to travel a great distance.

“You see, Mr. Gold, each of us is alone.  Each of us is in the great darkness of our ignorance.  And each of us is on a journey.  In the process of our journey, we must bend to build a fire for light and warmth and food.  But when our fingers tear at the ground, hoping to find the coals of another’s fire, what we often find are the ashes.  And in these ashes, which will not give us light or warmth, there may be sadness, but there is also testimony.  Because the ashes tell us that somebody else has been in the night, somebody else has bent to build a fire, and somebody else has carried on.  And sometimes, that can be enough.”

Noah ben Shea


I have my own story to tell.  I think that my healing journey may help others find their way through difficult situations.  Maybe my words will be the coals someone bends to find in the midst of their pain.   It is time to write so that others can hold the pages in their hands, and be warmed by the hope that they too can carry on.   I look forward to bringing you excerpts from my book as I begin to tell my story of finding God in the midst of pain, and healing even though a chronic condition remains.