Archive for journey

Grace = Gratitude

12/06/12 Jan Comments (0)

Heart in red wood

The second experience was last night when I shared the evening with a group of ladies who all work at Regis High School. Their small WISE group read my book and asked me to come discuss with them. The love and friendship shared among these women was clear to me from the start, and I was privileged to join them for dinner and an evening of stories. The energy of love and healing moving through the group enveloped me and I can still feel and see their arms of love and support around me and each other this morning.

The grace filled moments continue this morning as I try to put into words my experiences. I am drawn back into another time in my life when I was lucky enough to see a great man, Jim Rohn, present on becoming your best. At the end of his talk in front of 3000 people, he put his hands together in prayer pose and bowed to everyone in the audience. That simple movement spoke to me of such gratitude- we were the lucky ones to hear him speak, and yet, he was showing us that he felt changed by the experience too. As I left last night, I put my hands in prayer pose and whispered Namaste. ”The God or light in me sees the God or light in you.”

Grace shows up when we are open to the experiences in our lives, and we are willing to learn and move forward with a new vision. Today, the only word I have for the joy these experiences bring to me is G-R-A-T-I-T-U-D-E.

Comments (0)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection

Tags : acceptance, Awareness, divine energy, fellow travelers, gratitude, journey, reflecting on encounters with others

Receiving Love

11/06/12 Jan Comments (0)

My daughter Sarah will leave school today to lead a retreat. The Kairos retreat is a significant experience in the lives of students who attend Jesuit institutions. At Regis High School, students attend Kairos in the junior year and have the opportunity to lead a group at the retreat in their senior year. I am grateful Sarah has the chance to not only look at her life and reflect on her own growth, but to relay her story to others and provide hope. On our drive this morning to drop her at school, I told Sarah that my prayer this week would be for her to be open to the experience and allow praise and affirmation to come back in without judgment. Like so many of us, she is one who has a hard time accepting compliments. It made me think of the many ways our posture affects how well we receive.

My friend Andrea just blogged about being open to the support around us. Many times, we pull in when things are tough, maybe as a way of protecting ourselves from more pain. And when we “clam up” we are literally pulling ourselves into a shell where we think we can’t feel pain, and we can’t receive the love and support that is coming our way. We become isolated from the only thing that can save us- connection.

Besides being a clam, we can also stand as a brick wall. We may look like we are open to what the world is ready to offer, yet we stand rigid with close fists and a carefully guarded heart, and an air of judgement surrounding us. The person who is judged most harshly is our own self.

Standing with arms open and palms up, even if only energetically, we allow ourselves to receive what is good from the universe. Yes, we are most vulnerable in this position, yet it is this same vulnerability that links us to others, and we are connected by our imperfections. We we are not so afraid to be human, amazing things happen.

So today and this week, I am praying that Sarah will stand with arms open wide, willingly receiving all the love and praise she deserves.

And what stance will you take today? Are you willing to receive all of life with ease and joy?

Comments (0)

Categories : Coaching, Inspiration and Connection

Tags : acceptance, allowing, courage, daughters, fellow travelers, growing, journey, letting go, love, receiving, reflecting on life

Walking the Labyrinth

11/01/12 Jan Comments (1)

Today, I walked the labyrinth at Unity on the Avenue Church on 17th Avenue in Denver. It was the first date I had with myself for a very long time. Here are some of the lessons I learned on my journey today:

There is no wrong or right way to move through life- there is only this moment to notice and embrace!

It is not about arriving and leaving, coming and going, beginning and ending- it is about becoming more aware of your journey at this moment, and finding peace.

I have a tendency to want to skip ahead in time- to look to what is coming next instead of really experiencing this moment. It took me most of the labyrinth to become aware of more than just the sound of passing cars- I finally tuned into the squirrel scampering up the fence, five different bird songs, and the crunch of the gravel under my feet. Then I noticed the blueberries, just two, dropped inside the path, and wondered who had dropped such a sweet surprise. When I was able to release the voices in my head, my heart steadied,and I became present to the world around me.

How is it that the 27 year old relationship with my husband and the 22 years of relationships with my children speak louder than the 48 years I have spent with myself? What I feel in the depths is a longing and desire to find me and develop a loving relationship with this soul, this body, this person who has been my life-long companion. I have no desire to tame her- rather I hope to unleash her passions for life and encourage her to come out and play, to increase the fun in her life. I want to love and accept all of her without judgment.

I am creating space in my life- setting my intention that quiet moments will be filled with conscious breath and more listening. The deeper meaning in my life will come with repeated trips to my center, moving deeper and deeper through the experiences in my life. And, like the author T. S Elliot says,

“We shall not cease from our exploration
And at the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time”

Will you join me as we wander through the inner wilderness our our own hearts, and learn to love ourselves for the first time?

Comments (1)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection

Tags : acceptance, allowing, Awareness, fellow travelers, gratitude, journey, labyrinth, Living in the present moment, meditation, reflection, self care

Soccer Season Comes to an End

10/29/12 Jan Comments (1)

It was a beautiful afternoon for a walk around the neighborhood park. It is the last week of soccer season, which means the last game for my daughter is on Saturday. She doesn’t play soccer for her high school, so she will be grieving the loss of such an amazing part of her life. Tony will also be grieving. He coached Becca’s team for 13 years, and then took over Sarah’s team. Soccer has been his afternoon and weekend hobby for as long as we can remember.

On one side of the park, little 7 year old girls in pink t-shirts and pigtails were playing their white counterparts in a make-up game. On the other field, sporting odd outfits and mismatched pony tails and shin guards on the outside of socks, were Tony’s girls, mostly high school seniors, who are laughing their way through practice.

As we all learn to find new ways to spend our time on weekends, I can’t help but think of the times in our lives when we let go of an activity at the end of a season- a season dictated by weather, age, or any of life’s transitions. So maybe soccer won’t be the way we choose to fill our Saturdays anymore, but there will be something new to challenge us, and hopefully help us to laugh and find joy in life. I may have left childhood a long time ago, but the crunching of fall leaves under my feet still makes me want to dance and giggle!

We tell the story of one dad who, at the end of a soccer season, told Tony “Thanks for all you do.” And he didn’t mean just soccer. He meant thanks for all the lessons of life learned on a soccer field, especially the ones that remind you to keep growing!

What activities have come to an end for you in this season of life? What did you learn from your experiences with this activity? What is something new you can learn? Maybe something you have always wanted to do but never had the time? There is no time like the present!

Comments (1)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection

Tags : acceptance, gratitude, growing, journey, learning new things, present moment, soccer

Are You Part of the Problem? Or the Solution?

04/15/11 Jan Comments (0)

Yesterday, I spent the afternoon with my friend Andrea Costantine watching the movie “I Am” Created by the producer of movies such as Ace Ventura and Bruce Almighty, this documentary was made after his own close brush with death. He took a camera crew and went around the world interviewing scientists and the lovely Desmond Tutu, asking what is wrong with the world, and what can we do about it. What he discovered is more about what is right with the world, and how we can be part of the solution rather than increasing the problem. Our DNA is 99% the same as all living life on the planet, down to little insects. Our human nature isn’t to be competitive, but rather cooperative. Our emotions have an action in the world, and since we are connected to everyone, the people who are hurting around the world are affecting our own lives.

If you can take the time to see it, do it now. It isn’t going to be in theaters very long. You will be glad you did.

I Am the Movie

Comments (0)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection

Tags : Awareness, fellow travelers, journey, love, reflecting on encounters with others

Living the Imperfect Moments

03/24/11 Jan Comments (1)

The spiritual life is about being open to every moment, however incomplete, because every moment in life has something to teach us about what it means to live well. It is about realizing that sometimes the perfection of the moment lies in accepting its imperfections.

Joan Chittister, Welcome to the Wisdom of the World

I love this quote. It reminds me that even when I feel like I am not moving forward towards my goals, there is something of value to be found in every moment along the way. I was sitting with Andrea Costantine yesterday and we talked about how both of us tend to go where the wind blows us. She is a fellow traveler on the road, moving in and through opportunities as they arise, just like me. My life hasn’t been marked with the traditional success path of climbing a corporate ladder, or sticking to a career for 20 plus years. I haven’t made it big in the stock market, and I don’t have a rich relative who will leave me a fortune. But what I do have is the belief that every situation I have encountered has prepared me for the next. I have a unique set of skills that continues to build and apply to the next opportunity I find. I like Andrea’s idea that opportunities are permission slips to move ahead and try something new. If it doesn’t stick, well, then I have gained something that will prove to be useful in the future. And even if I don’t fit a traditional definition of success, I just have to look at the love and friendship around me to know that I have done many things right in my life. So I am freeing myself from living the perfect life, and being content being perfectly human! If you missed my piece last year on a train bound for somewhere, you can catch it here.

What is right is only that which must be done at the present moment, even when we are not sure exactly what that is.

Joan Chittister, Welcome to the Wisdom of the World

What about you? How are you living the imperfect moments in your life?

Comments (1)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection, Writing

Tags : Awareness, fellow travelers, intuition, journey, Living in the present moment, reflecting on encounters with others, trust

Happy Holidays

12/23/10 Jan Comments (1)

Wishing you…

*Friends who bring joy

*Family gatherings where everyone leaves their baggage at the door

*Amazing food that feeds your soul

*Moments of reflecting on your accomplishments of 2010

*Planning time for an abundant new year

*Love and Laughter that rings through your celebrations

But mostly,

I wish you peace.

I wish you space to recognize all the good in your life. May the spirit of this holiday time enfold you, comfort you, and remind you that despite the difficulties this year may have held, everything is unfolding as it should.

Love is born into the world, and with all our efforts, we can make 2011 a year of abundance and goodness to remember!

Comments (1)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection

Tags : allowing, gratitude, journey, letting go, Living in the present moment, reflecting on encounters with others, reflection

Happy Thanks Living!

11/24/10 Jan Comments (3)

I saw a church sign this week that said, “Thanksgiving is nice but Thanks Living is better.” I love the idea that every day I get up and walk in gratefulness for my life- the people, the things, the blessings that fill me with joy. So often we look at the things we don’t have and miss the cup that is overflowing in our hands.

Fifteen years ago, I was celebrating a homecoming that was incredibly meaningful, mainly because I was still alive after a massive infection kept me in the hospital for close to 150 days.

Here is an excerpt from my story:

Yesterday was Thanksgiving, and it was a wonderful, joyful, tear-filled celebration. It felt so good to be able to sit down with my family and eat a normal dinner, drink wine and celebrate the gift of life. Nothing poured out of my belly, and even though I’m still dealing with the diarrhea, I’m keeping my fingers crossed that things will improve soon.

I thanked Tony for doing such a fantastic job with the little girls all year, keeping them healthy and fed, and taking care of their emotional needs. And I thanked him for being my rock and strength, helping me to survive an unimaginable illness.

He looked at me through his tears and said, “I am just thankful you are here.”

“Me too,” I cried.

So this Thanksgiving, I will be remembering these years I have lived on borrowed time, thanking God for giving me a second chance at life. I have been here to watch my three daughters turn into amazing young women who inspire me with their courage, their wisdom and their love of life. I am here to celebrate 25 years of marriage to my best friend Tony.

I don’t know what the future holds for me. I can’t begin to imagine where my book “Moving Mountains” will take me, and who will be touched by my story of hope. Even as I look to the future and wonder how things will work out, I bring myself back to this moment, where I know that life is amazing, and I am here to celebrate it.

May you be truly present to the gifts that are around you this Thanksgiving, and may you be inspired to move into a place of Thanks Living.

Comments (3)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection, Writing

Tags : Awareness, Faith, gratitude, journey, Living in the present moment, She Moved Mountains, The Book Project, writing

Earth Angels

09/15/10 Jan Comments (5)

Thank God for the helpers who come along right when you need them.

I was on my way home from the cabin and hadn’t even gotten to Berthoud Pass when the temperature gauge on my car went past hot in a matter of minutes. I pulled into the Alco parking lot in Frasier and wondered what I would do next. I saw a man sitting in his car and asked him if he was from the area. He was not but suggested that I go into the local coffee shop and see if I could find someone who knew a good mechanic.

There were only a few people in the shop- it was 10;30 in the morning, past the local rush. However, I stood at the counter and asked a few people if they knew of a good mechanic in Frasier. A wonderful gentleman by the name of Jack said that he did and asked me what kind of car I had. I told him I had a Toyota and what the problem was. He mentioned that the mechanic was just down the street and he would be happy to take me there, after he finished his cup of coffee. He suggested that I have a cup too.

I learned that Jack has had a place in the valley for 30 years and moved there permanently when he retired 15 years ago. His passion is skiing and he is able to ski up to 90 days a year. Jack said the discount for seniors makes it affordable. I told him I had spent the weekend writing and we talked about another Denver author I should look up. We talked for about fifteen minutes and then he said, “Let’s take a look at your car.”

Here is where I admit my ignorance: I can count on one hand the number of times I have opened the hood to my car, and I would have fingers left. As soon as the hood was open, it was clear that I was completely out of coolant. Jack took me into Alco, found some coolant and a gallon of water and carried them to the front of the store for me, just so when I paid, I would get the senior discount!

We filled up the car, and I followed him back to Tabernash, just to make sure the lack of coolant was the only problem with the car. When we stopped, I thanked him again for being such a kind person to step in and help. Jack said, “I have daughters!” and I completely understood his concern. He made sure I had the number of the local mechanic just in case I needed a tow back from the top of the pass, and then he and I went our separate ways.

The total cost of my bill? Eleven dollars for the coolant (with the senior discount!), $1.50 for my cup of tea, and $5 for the gift card I left Jack at the shop for the next time he buys his coffee. What I got in return? A car that traveled beautifully back to Denver, a wonderful conversation with a dear man and a chance to see Love in action in the form of an earth angel.

Thank you Jack, wherever you are! You made my life a lot easier today and I thank God you were in the right place at the right time.

Comments (5)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection

Tags : Earth Angels, Faith, fellow travelers, gratitude, journey, love, reflecting on encounters with others, trust

Gratitude

09/13/10 Jan Comments (0)

If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.

Meister Eckhart

I had the luxury of spending the weekend at the family cabin on Columbine Lake right outside Grand Lake. It was an amazing weekend to spend by myself, organizing my journal from 15 years ago into the story called She Moved Mountains. It is the story of my journey back to health over a years time. As I was organizing the section I call “The Long Haul,” I was almost physically sick thinking about what my husband and I did to survive- countless dressing changes on an open belly wound, weekly trips to doctor’s offices, and lots of unknowns about my physical health. I hope that my condensation of the summer of my illness allows the readers to get a glimpse of what we went through, and how we came out on the better end of the deal.

I am grateful to Fran and Carol for letting me stay at the cabin. It is an amazing place and this time of year is magical. I loved getting up early to see the fish jump at least a foot out of the water to catch their breakfast. The aspen are turning and although the nights are cold, the days were in the 60s and 70s- just perfect for several walks around the lake. I even climbed the winter sledding hill and found a nice rock perch on which to view 360 degrees of mountains. I reflected on my life, especially in relation to where I was 15 years ago on the brink of death, and I realize just how precious life is, and how spectacular my life is now. I have an amazing husband who loves me and who supports my dream to write this book. I have beautiful daughters who continue to bless my life with their laughter and wisdom. And I have countless friends who grace my life with their own experiences. I am richly blessed. The only response that could possibly express what I was thinking was “Thank you.”

Comments (0)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection

Tags : Awareness, Faith, gratitude, journey, joy, Living in the present moment, reflecting on encounters with others, self care, She Moved Mountains, The Book Project, trust, writing

Speaking Your Truth: Be Inspired!

08/25/10 Jan Comments (5)

Today is the day! Please order your Speaking Your Truth book at Amazon.com

This book is a great read in itself or an inspiring gift for a friend, colleague, or family member.

Be inspired by women’s stories about Finding Your Path, Health and Healing, Family Matters, Love and Abuse, Faith and Spirituality and Self-Discovery.

I tell a little bit of my story in a chapter called “The Bedpan” You will learn about my journey back to health after a lengthy illness. I have had so much positive feedback from writing this little segment that I am working diligently on my own book to be ready next spring. Stay tuned here for further details.

Thank you so much for supporting all of us. You can get one for yourself and buy one as a gift and receive free shipping. And hopefully you will find even one story that can give you the inspiration you are looking for to reach for your dreams.

Comments (5)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection

Tags : fellow travelers, journey, learning new things, Speaking Your Truth; women; inspiration, The Book Project

A Healing Presence

08/12/10 Jan Comments (3)

I am committed to being a healing presence in the world.

This statement came to me as I was finishing my third healing touch session for the day. I was playing over in my head my heart virtue, or at least what I thought was my heart virtue- something about inspiring others to awaken to their own divine power. I had taken an all day workshop in February to identify my heart virtue, a guiding light on my path of life.

I am committed to being a healing presence in the world. This statement rolled off my tongue and out into the world in glorious wonder. It is concise and to the point, and contains very powerful words.

BEING- Notice I didn’t say I was committed to DOING. All of my life I have been a doer, thinking that I need to accomplish something to be worth something. God is telling me that just by BEING, I can make a difference in the world.

PRESENCE: I am choosing to write about this word next because it defines my heart virtue more than any word. What I love to do and feel I do quite well, is BE WITH. I can be with someone in a one on one session, or I can be with someone when I am writing and am able to touch their inner being with my words. When I am present to something or someone, my whole body and mind are attentive to the action/task at hand. Maybe that means being tuned in to guidance for what healing touch technique would work best on this person now. Or it means listening with compassion and allowing someone to share their story. Presence is when I am in the flow and the words to a meditation just pour out of my mouth, or a section of my book is on the page in no time at all. Presence means I am here right now and it is the only place to find love and peace.

HEALING: This one is easy. I just let God’s love shine through me and trust that who I am in the world is enough. I have had those experiences where people I don’t know very well will open up to me and share their challenges. I believe that is because God’s love flowing through me creates a safe space for people to be real. I also believe that my own healing journey gives me some credentials that others can relate to. It is as if the words “I knocked on death’s door and lived to tell about it” are stamped across my forehead. I have been in a place many of these people are now experiencing, and they just want someone to hear them. I love the quote “There is no one I can’t learn to love once I know their story.” It is about acceptance that all of us are human and we are doing our best to find our way. If I can be a healing light to help someone’s journey, than I am living the life God intended for me.

The three words, Being, Healing and Presence fit so nicely together and create a very powerful statement about who I am and how I choose to live my life.

I am committed to being a healing presence in the world. I am grateful that I have the intuitive awareness to recognize this as my heart virtue and I look forward to moving out into the world, sharing more of who I am with the world.

Comments (3)

Categories : Inspiration and Connection